Diary of a Super Slow Runner

I've written before about how I know I'm a slow runner, and I don't expect to get MUCH faster over time. In fact, I am actually becoming more comfortable where I am, though still working to get faster (with mixed results).

But at this point, I've been thinking more about my preferred running conditions - mostly in the realm of "run with a group or alone?"

It doesn't make sense, but I tend to push myself more when I run alone. I do run with my coaches for Team in Training, but I sort of feel like I end up going a bit slower. When I run with friends (who typically tend to be a bit (or a lot) faster than I am), I find myself feeling bad for slowing them down.

When I run in a race, I tend to shut out the other people around me and focus on my running. I'm a music runner - but I have also found out that I can run without music. Both ways allow me to focus on myself.

I realize that running with a friend or group has its benefits - I probably would've stayed in bed yesterday had I not been running with someone. But I end up feeling a pressure when running with others (usually one that I impose on myself) that somewhat hinders me.

It's odd - it sort of goes against all logic. But as a super slow runner who is trying to accept that I'm not going to be a 9 minute miler (and tends to be an overachiever), I think it makes me feel like a failure to be super slow. I'm getting better at dealing with where I am, and remind myself that I'm doing a lot more than many people do. I've pushed myself outside of my comfort zone (the couch) and had some great experiences doing so.

So, as I begin my taper this week for my half marathon, I remember that my goal is to beat my time in my D.C. race. I will run that race and do my best. And I will FINISH.