Just when you thought it was safe...

Yesterday was awful. The only thing that made it better was going out for sushi for dinner. Work just kicked my butt - I had a lot of constituents, lots of phone calls coming in, and just really felt like I got nothing done for as busy as I was. So, today had to be better, right?

Not so much. Today ended up being a day that just made me feel drained, sad, and just plain sick. I skipped out on happy hour plans because I just had to withdraw. The last few hours of the day, I just felt so useless, didn't want to be there, tired, and just wanted to cry. I'm going to guess that partly, I don't feel well, and the other part of me feeling like this is I'm just feeling a little insignificant. Hm, I sound like a commercial for Zoloft. Sigh.

I'm a little confused because I feel lonely, yet I want to be alone. That doesn't really make any sense, does it?

Oh, all the things to catch up on...

So, most of you probably know, I don’t have cable in my apartment. In most ways, this is a good thing. But, there are so many TV shows on cable stations that I want to watch, that I’m now requesting them from the library. And, that’s not even counting the shows that I just totally missed when they were on! Here is a list of what I’d like to catch up on:

Damages
The Closer
Rome (though, it’s apparently not on anymore)
The Wire
Mad Men
Big Love
Veronica Mars
Gilmore Girls
Dexter
Weeds
The L Word

In other news – since I started writing this morning, it was reported on the news that John Edwards will be dropping out of the presidential campaign. While this saddens me, I hope that it causes the two front-runners in the Democratic Party to adopt the issues of poverty and the shrinking middle class as major concerns for our country. We, as a country, need to understand that until our citizens are taken care of, there is no way the United State can truly prosper. Sure, there will be the rich few that can afford anything they want, but the normal person is still looking for a job after being laid off, trying to figure out how to support their family, or choosing between food and medication for themselves.

Thank goodness it's already Wednesday night. I can’t wait to relax this weekend!


Currently reading: The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman

Word.

Very interesting commentary from Lou Dobbs.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/01/22/Dobbs.January23/index.html


How are you going to spend your money? I'll probably pay off debt...

I was alone, I took a ride...

You all thought I was getting a car this weekend? Yeah, me too! Unfortunately, it didn't happen, and I will be getting my Taurus fixed. Though, I am currently driving a rented Chevy Cobalt. Woo hoo! It's a two door though. Blech.

I'm feeling overwhelmed right now. I have been busier at work, I have lots of stuff to do for the Jaycees (I'm currently taking a break from my hard work this evening), and the car issue has just been frustrating. Then, this morning, Eric and I were getting ready to drive back to Muskegon from Lansing, and he had a flat tire!!! Needless to say, what should have only taken us an hour and a half took more like 4 hours. Sigh. So, there was a lot of wasted time today, and I'm trying to get all my laundry done!!!

I have tomorrow off, but I don't think it's really going to feel like it. This week is super busy for me, as I'm doing two shifts for the Jaycees for our Texas Hold 'Em fundraiser. Sigh, oh well, I will enjoy the time I do have for myself!!!

Off to finish my part of the chapter plan, do laundry, and then finally read. It's going to be a looooooong night.

Baby, you can drive my car...

So, last week, I was driving home, and went over a railroad track. After that, I started hearing a knocking noise when I hit bumps. I finally got the car in today to get looked at, and it needed (overall) almost $1700 in repairs.

Needless to say, my decision is to go car shopping on Friday. Eric will be coming here to help me out. I'm fairly certain I know what I want, but it's a matter of finding it. We knew this was coming down the road sometime, so I'm not surprised. I am excited about getting a new car, but also just really anxious. It's just frustrating to have that happen and have to make a huge decision.

I was bad tonight, and brought home McDonald's for dinner. While my plate was sitting on the stove, my dog smelled it, ran into the kitchen, and went SPLAT! right into the oven. She hit the oven just as she was jumping up to try and smell the food more closely. So, she really ran into the oven with her stomach. It was really funny, cause she basically went flying into the oven. Silly doggie.

For the rest of the evening, I will be sitting in my chair, being lazy. It's 8pm and I'm ready for bed. (yawn)


Currently reading: A Free Life by Ha Jin

Talking 'bout my generation...

There's a fantastic article in Newsweek about the upcoming election and my generation.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22597888/

I have to believe that this article hits it right on the head for me, and what I've seen so far in the 2008 presidential race. There are a lot of people my age and younger who are just pissed off, and have seen a lot of things to have had their confidence in the world and country shaken. We have every right to be this way. We live in a world where NOTHING is guaranteed to us, no matter how many college degrees we have. Health care is something many of us live without, which makes it harder for us if we get sick. For me, it's scary to even think about starting a family, buying a house, buying a new car, getting my current car fixed - why? Because how do I pay for it? I'm still in debt from school, and trying to get rid of that first! With mounting debt, how in the world do you get a decent rate on a loan?

I really think this presidential race is going to be one that is unlike any that have come before it. It will take awhile for candidates to be determined from each side. There will be more questions than ever before from the voters. Young people will be a huge influence on the candidates, and who becomes president. I, for one, am not ready to deal with the same type of government that has been in charge of our country. I am ready for a change, as are the other members of the Millenials.


Currently Listening: My whole Beatles collection!

Hakuna Matata

This is the first day in awhile where I've gotten home and don't feel like I'm going to pass out from a headache. I have big plans for my evening, including reading more in my book, getting out my scrapbooking stuff, and maybe watching a movie! We'll see how much I actually do!

I decided the other day that I'm actually going to vote in the primary. I wasn't sure what I was going to do - John Edwards isn't on the ballot here in Michigan, so my candidate won't be an option to vote for. There have been all sorts of options floating around for those of us who support candidates that aren't on the ballot. I'm still torn about the whole situation, but I will be voting. I understand there should be a new plan for primaries, but it's hard to justify losing delegates.

Currently Listening: Chase This Light by Jimmy Eat World

Perpetually confused...

You ever just feel confused? That's how I've been feeling lately. I'm not quite sure how to be less confused right now. Nothing is ever easy, is it?

Don't get me wrong - I'm in a pretty good mood, just feel a little off kilter and unsure!

First full week of the New Year

So, tomorrow marks the beginning of the first full week of 2008. I am hoping that it also brings fewer headaches with it. I have had a headache at some point each day for the last 4-5 days. I haven't felt stressed, so I'm not quite sure why I've been getting them.

I'm still trying to keep to my resolutions, and most of them are going well. I have only gotten on my bike once though, so I have to try to make it a habit by doing it multiple days in row. I'll start in the morning. :-)

I have been reading each day, so I'm about halfway through my second book of the year. Movies are going well also - just have to keep it up. I also bought a new planner on Friday, because I decided there wasn't enough room in the one I was using. This week at work, I will also be continuing to make sure things are in order and organized. This year is certainly going to be busy all around for me, and I must be prepared for it!

Additional Resolutions...

I have two additions to my New Year's resolutions - be more organized and be more motivated. While at work today, I thought of both of these. I believe it will help me in all of my endeavors this year!

Those of you who have known me for quite awhile know that I've usually been quite organized - in ways most people would just never be able to understand. I've lost that over the last couple of years, so I will be returning myself to keeping a calendar that I will carry with me. Maybe even go back to the planner...

In doing that, I hope it will help me be more motivated to do the tasks I need to do, whether it be for work, Jaycees, PPYL, or whatever.

Also, I have a resolution to be more positive about myself. I plan on trying to do this not only with myself, but also making sure I say these things to others. Now, how do I say good things about myself without sounding pompous? LOL.

50 books to read in 2008

I'm following my friend Mandi's lead, and did a list of 50 books I should read this year. Now, I may or may not finish this list, and I am allowed to veer off the list to other reads. On with the list...



() The Fall (Camus)
() American Creation (Ellis)
(X) Man Gone Down (Thomas)
()World Without End (Follett)
()The Pillars of the Earth - re-read (Follett)
(X)Gentlemen of the Road (Chabon)
()The Yiddish Policemen's Union (Chabon)
(X)The Other Boleyn Girl (Gregory)
()Team of Rivals (Kearns)
()The Mascot (Kurzem)
(X)Then We Came to the End (Ferris)
()The Russian Concubine (Furnivall)
()Jane Eyre (Bronte)
()Thunderstruck (Larson)
()Schulz and Peanuts (Michaelis)
(X)A Thousand Splendid Suns (Hosseini)
()Tree of Smoke (Johnson)
()On the Road (Kerouac)
()The Savage Detectives (Bolano)
()Midnight's Children (Rushdie)
()The Fortress of Solitude (Lethem)
()A People's History of the United States (Zinn)
()The World is Flat (Friedman)
()Kabul Beauty School (Rodriguez)
()1776 (McCullough)
()My Life (Clinton)
()The Myth of the Rational Voter (Caplan)
()A Tale of Two Cities (Dickens)
()Eat Pray Love (Gilbert)
()The End of Poverty (Sachs)
()The Plot Against America (Roth)
()Ragtime (Doctorow)
()Parting the Waters (Branch)
()From Beirut to Jerusalem (Friedman)
()Clapton: The Autobiography (Clapton)
()What is the What (Eggers)
()White Teeth (Smith)
()Breakfast of Champions (Vonnegut)
()The Inheritence of Loss (Desai)
()The Good Earth (Buck)
()Boom! Voices of the Sixties (Brokaw)
(X)Daughter of Fortune (Allende)
()The Brief Wonderous Life of Oscar Wao (Diaz)
()Manhunt: The 12 Day Chase for Lincoln's Killer (Swanson)
()The Guns of August (Tuchman)
()Catch-22 (Heller)
()The Sun Also Rises (Hemingway)
()Marie Antoinette (Fraser)
()The Crimson Petal and the White (Faber)
()Emma (Austen)
(X)A Free Life (Jin)


Currently Reading: Daughter of Fortune by Isabel Allende