I'm taking a short break tonight to write a bit about something that was brewing in my head yesterday on a long drive to Ludington and back.
Balance and Boundaries.
Over the last couple of months, it's felt a little like life has been spinning out of control. Mix in getting used to new things about 2014 and starting two classes for school, and it's been pretty scary.
But I finally had a little time to start sorting out my schedule and getting things back in order. And once I did that I realized a few things:
1) I can say "no".
2) I need to get caught up and keep up.
3) I need more fun time to balance out the work, school and other commitments.
4) I don't take the time I need for myself.
And that's where Balance and Boundaries come in.
I have commitments that I've made to myself and to others. I will honor those. But I will also be working on not offering to do everything, unless it's part of those commitments. I have personal goals and I can't succeed with those unless I curb other things.
Boundaries are being set. I've missed a lot of things because I've always tried to make myself available. I've been working since the new year (and before) to limit my time with technology, on social media, etc. It's helping with my attention span and my productivity. I'm doing more of the things I like to do instead of getting sucked into things for too much time.
This semester in particular is going to be extremely busy. While I didn't prepare properly before it started, I finally feel like I'm starting to get some traction on the new year and things are falling into place.
This year I will be working toward Balance in my life and Boundaries will help me achieve that.
Monday, January 13, 2014
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Tales of the Absentminded Me
First off, I apologize. Over the last month or so, I have lost my damn mind. I'm not particularly sure where it is, but I probably lost it sometime in early December, so it may be in D.C.
Since Thanksgiving, I've taken two work trips, a fun trip, and was home for about two weeks total. I co-chaired a big project for the Jaycees that ended up being more than I had counted on. Household chores went by the wayside, Dakota spent a lot of time on vacation (which equals lots of biscuits), my brain and ody were not sure where I was and lots of money was spent. Just before the new year, after returning from Boston, I crashed.
And I haven't quite adjusted since then. And that's turned into things just looking like a huge mess in my calendar, email, on paper, and at home. I know I just have to look at it one small thing at a time to get the ball rolling, but with the weather and classes starting, it feels a bit overwhelming.
So I ask for your patience as I dig out of the hole I find myself in. There are things I've been neglecting (running) and things I've been doing too much of (sleeping). It's time to find the balance again and tips the scales in the right direction (literally, I have gained a good bit of weight since the half marathon). This may include scheduling my time more, being online less, spending more time studying (actually that's a given).
So, it's time to take a deep breath and get rid of this discombobulated feeling I've been dealing with.
What do you do to get back on track after crazy periods?
Since Thanksgiving, I've taken two work trips, a fun trip, and was home for about two weeks total. I co-chaired a big project for the Jaycees that ended up being more than I had counted on. Household chores went by the wayside, Dakota spent a lot of time on vacation (which equals lots of biscuits), my brain and ody were not sure where I was and lots of money was spent. Just before the new year, after returning from Boston, I crashed.
And I haven't quite adjusted since then. And that's turned into things just looking like a huge mess in my calendar, email, on paper, and at home. I know I just have to look at it one small thing at a time to get the ball rolling, but with the weather and classes starting, it feels a bit overwhelming.
So I ask for your patience as I dig out of the hole I find myself in. There are things I've been neglecting (running) and things I've been doing too much of (sleeping). It's time to find the balance again and tips the scales in the right direction (literally, I have gained a good bit of weight since the half marathon). This may include scheduling my time more, being online less, spending more time studying (actually that's a given).
So, it's time to take a deep breath and get rid of this discombobulated feeling I've been dealing with.
What do you do to get back on track after crazy periods?
Monday, January 6, 2014
Quasi-goals
December was such a crazy month for me that I hardly even thought of things I want to accomplish in the new year. I was mostly traveling, working, sleeping or reading (aka enjoying time off from school).
So the last few days, I've been getting sucked back into reality and 2014. I've paid my first round of bills for the year, adjusted my budget, prepared for classes to start, cleaned up the mess my apartment has turned into with me gone most of last month and signed up for races. So, in order to keep pace, here are some of the personal quasi-goals that keep running through my head.
- Get my passport this year
- Read 20 books
- Get back into training (yoga, running - 3 half marathons between March and May)
- Keep reducing debt (and making sure I keep up on my budget, which fell off the last half of 2013)
- Less technology time
- Be more mindful of what I eat
- Be me
Many of these are similar to years past. It happens. But I think it's more getting back on track to where I was before the last couple of crazy months that included finishing up a semester, travel and just plain feeling burned out and exhausted. I think that holiday break has helped and I hope to continue carrying the less stressed feeling that I've had recently.
It's time to get 2014 in gear!
So the last few days, I've been getting sucked back into reality and 2014. I've paid my first round of bills for the year, adjusted my budget, prepared for classes to start, cleaned up the mess my apartment has turned into with me gone most of last month and signed up for races. So, in order to keep pace, here are some of the personal quasi-goals that keep running through my head.
- Get my passport this year
- Read 20 books
- Get back into training (yoga, running - 3 half marathons between March and May)
- Keep reducing debt (and making sure I keep up on my budget, which fell off the last half of 2013)
- Less technology time
- Be more mindful of what I eat
- Be me
Many of these are similar to years past. It happens. But I think it's more getting back on track to where I was before the last couple of crazy months that included finishing up a semester, travel and just plain feeling burned out and exhausted. I think that holiday break has helped and I hope to continue carrying the less stressed feeling that I've had recently.
It's time to get 2014 in gear!
Friday, January 3, 2014
Outgrowing things
Over the past year, I've been working on a project to clean out my apartment from all of the stuff I've just moved around since I've been on my own. I'm still not done yet (it seems like I never will be), but at this point, I think I have ruled that it might be time to upgrade to a bigger apartment.
One of my goals for 2014 is to continue to purge items I don't need, but also start getting ready to move into a larger apartment in my complex later this year. In addition to more space, it'll provide office space that is much needed since I began working from home.
Everything is starting to feel crowded. It's me, Dakota and a bunch of stuff in a very small space. I hate using my kitchen because it's so small and there's not a ton of storage space. Granted, I just pay rent here and Dakota lives here.
As I've been cleaning things out, I've gone through a lot of pictures and papers. It got me thinking about other things I've either outgrown or seem like a lifetime away. I used to be in band and even auditioned for music school when I originally applied to college. There are things that I used to be extremely passionate about that I now don't quite know how I feel about them. There are things like running that I used to say "heck no!" and now I'm signed up for three half marathons between now and May.
It's just amazing to me how different needs arise over time. I once had a two bedroom apartment right after college, and it seemed very empty. However, now, over 10 years later, I'm fairly certain that I will have no problem filling one up and enjoying some space.
May 2014 be a year of continued growth!
One of my goals for 2014 is to continue to purge items I don't need, but also start getting ready to move into a larger apartment in my complex later this year. In addition to more space, it'll provide office space that is much needed since I began working from home.
Everything is starting to feel crowded. It's me, Dakota and a bunch of stuff in a very small space. I hate using my kitchen because it's so small and there's not a ton of storage space. Granted, I just pay rent here and Dakota lives here.
As I've been cleaning things out, I've gone through a lot of pictures and papers. It got me thinking about other things I've either outgrown or seem like a lifetime away. I used to be in band and even auditioned for music school when I originally applied to college. There are things that I used to be extremely passionate about that I now don't quite know how I feel about them. There are things like running that I used to say "heck no!" and now I'm signed up for three half marathons between now and May.
It's just amazing to me how different needs arise over time. I once had a two bedroom apartment right after college, and it seemed very empty. However, now, over 10 years later, I'm fairly certain that I will have no problem filling one up and enjoying some space.
May 2014 be a year of continued growth!
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Where do we go from here?
I've been in the car a lot the last few days, taking a trip to Boston for some sightseeing. As we were driving back, it dawned on me that today was going to be the last day of 2013, and I might want to write something about the past year and what 2014 might hold.
2013 was pretty good. I did a lot of traveling, had more time for me, got halfway through my MPA program at Western. In the last half of the year, I returned to reading more and ran my second half marathon.
When I started the year, I was writing down things that I was doing and putting them in a bucket to pull out today. I wasn't THAT good at keeping up with it, and hope to be better in 2014. But, here's a highlight list!
1/1/13: Ran my first 6 mile run on New Year's Day. Big deal, despite being last!
1/27/13: Honored to be named co-Key Member for the 2012 with the Lansing Jaycees and also receiving the Spirit of the Jaycees award for the second time in my career.
2/1/13: Got my first pedicure. Maybe I should go do that again.
2/2/13: Ran my first 8K in Frankenmuth. I was able to reach 11:01 min/mile. Subsequently went to Zehnder's for the first time and ate waaaay too much!
3/9/13: I ran 10 miles for the first time ever.
4/6/13: I ran 13 miles for the first time ever.
4/28/13: I ran my first half marathon in Washington, D.C. This was also my first trip to D.C. Along with the half marathon, another highlight of this trip was being able to visit Arlington Cemetery and see the Kennedy gravesites.
5/17/13: I shaved my head for cancer. 12 inches of hair was donated to Children with Hair Loss.
6/6/13: I got to visit Seattle and Portland again! I was also able to get maple bacon donuts. :-)
6/12/13: Fleetwood Mac was awesome in concert!
6/15/13: I felt honored to be there when Carrie and Jason were engaged. :-)
7/2/13: One year work anniversary. I feel lucky to have the opportunity to learn on the job.
8/25/13: I went camping...and liked it?
8/26/13: I met Batman today! Adam West signed my Batman button.
9/2/13: I ran across the Mackinac Bridge. This was an amazing experience.
10/20/13: I ran my second half marathon - the Grand Rapids Half. I didn't do as well as I had hoped, but I received my first real bling!
11/19/13: I officially am halfway through my MPA degree program.
12/4 - 6/13: I was able to visit D.C. again for a work trip. During this time I was lucky enough to sit in the Supreme Court chambers and pay my respects to Nelson Mandela at the South African Embassy when he passed away.
12/17/13: I've been able to keep a 4.0 GPA in my grad program.
12/27 - 30/13: Visited the JFK Presidential Museum (2nd one on the Presidential Libraries list), walked the Freedom Trail, and did other various touristy things in Boston. Also visited 4 state capitals (Albany, Boston, Providence, Hartford) during the trip.
Which brings me to today, the last day of 2013. Somewhere in there, my trivia team won $1,500, I met some great new people, cut some negativity out of my life and continued to try to make a difference.
Today, I'm catching up on sleep, getting ready to run (walk) a 5K tomorrow (I've been horrible about running since the half in October) in order to jump start my training for the year, cleaning up, finishing a book. I'm also working on things to focus on in 2014, which will include:
Running - I plan on doing 3 half marathons this spring - March, April and May. Maybe one in June also.
Work - Always something new to learn!
Yoga - I need to go back, if not just to use the 5 classes I bought. But more because I need it.
Technology - I need less of this in my life.
School - I have two classes this spring, and then a semester off before going back full throttle again. I'm looking to keep up the GPA.
Jaycees - Local and state board. It'll be nice to be back and I'm thankful for people that are helping me return.
Reading - I need to make sure I make time to read for fun.
There are times that have been difficult in 2013. The best I can do is take what I've gotten from the good and the bad times and move forward into 2014. I hope that 2014 brings joy and success to you all.
Happy New Year!
2013 was pretty good. I did a lot of traveling, had more time for me, got halfway through my MPA program at Western. In the last half of the year, I returned to reading more and ran my second half marathon.
When I started the year, I was writing down things that I was doing and putting them in a bucket to pull out today. I wasn't THAT good at keeping up with it, and hope to be better in 2014. But, here's a highlight list!
1/1/13: Ran my first 6 mile run on New Year's Day. Big deal, despite being last!
1/27/13: Honored to be named co-Key Member for the 2012 with the Lansing Jaycees and also receiving the Spirit of the Jaycees award for the second time in my career.
2/1/13: Got my first pedicure. Maybe I should go do that again.
2/2/13: Ran my first 8K in Frankenmuth. I was able to reach 11:01 min/mile. Subsequently went to Zehnder's for the first time and ate waaaay too much!
3/9/13: I ran 10 miles for the first time ever.
4/6/13: I ran 13 miles for the first time ever.
4/28/13: I ran my first half marathon in Washington, D.C. This was also my first trip to D.C. Along with the half marathon, another highlight of this trip was being able to visit Arlington Cemetery and see the Kennedy gravesites.
5/17/13: I shaved my head for cancer. 12 inches of hair was donated to Children with Hair Loss.
6/6/13: I got to visit Seattle and Portland again! I was also able to get maple bacon donuts. :-)
6/12/13: Fleetwood Mac was awesome in concert!
6/15/13: I felt honored to be there when Carrie and Jason were engaged. :-)
7/2/13: One year work anniversary. I feel lucky to have the opportunity to learn on the job.
8/25/13: I went camping...and liked it?
8/26/13: I met Batman today! Adam West signed my Batman button.
9/2/13: I ran across the Mackinac Bridge. This was an amazing experience.
10/20/13: I ran my second half marathon - the Grand Rapids Half. I didn't do as well as I had hoped, but I received my first real bling!
11/19/13: I officially am halfway through my MPA degree program.
12/4 - 6/13: I was able to visit D.C. again for a work trip. During this time I was lucky enough to sit in the Supreme Court chambers and pay my respects to Nelson Mandela at the South African Embassy when he passed away.
12/17/13: I've been able to keep a 4.0 GPA in my grad program.
12/27 - 30/13: Visited the JFK Presidential Museum (2nd one on the Presidential Libraries list), walked the Freedom Trail, and did other various touristy things in Boston. Also visited 4 state capitals (Albany, Boston, Providence, Hartford) during the trip.
Which brings me to today, the last day of 2013. Somewhere in there, my trivia team won $1,500, I met some great new people, cut some negativity out of my life and continued to try to make a difference.
Today, I'm catching up on sleep, getting ready to run (walk) a 5K tomorrow (I've been horrible about running since the half in October) in order to jump start my training for the year, cleaning up, finishing a book. I'm also working on things to focus on in 2014, which will include:
Running - I plan on doing 3 half marathons this spring - March, April and May. Maybe one in June also.
Work - Always something new to learn!
Yoga - I need to go back, if not just to use the 5 classes I bought. But more because I need it.
Technology - I need less of this in my life.
School - I have two classes this spring, and then a semester off before going back full throttle again. I'm looking to keep up the GPA.
Jaycees - Local and state board. It'll be nice to be back and I'm thankful for people that are helping me return.
Reading - I need to make sure I make time to read for fun.
There are times that have been difficult in 2013. The best I can do is take what I've gotten from the good and the bad times and move forward into 2014. I hope that 2014 brings joy and success to you all.
Happy New Year!
Tuesday, December 24, 2013
Lazy makeup
I understand this may come as a shock to people, but I like makeup. I have quite a bit of it, especially eye shadow. The problem is, I'm lazy. When it comes to making the choice between sleeping 5 extra minutes and putting on makeup in the morning, sleep almost always (99.999% of the time) wins.
Most of the time, people see me without makeup, so it's a surprise when I do end up wearing it. It doesn't quite seem to go along with the rest of me: laid back, nerdy, etc.
2013 was a lot about purging things in my life. That will continue into the new year, along with trying to be a little more put together. 2014 is coming up and because I've spent some money recently on some makeup I really like, one of my goals is to start wearing it on a more regular basis.
So here's my ask to you all - do you have tips on getting it into my routine? Or ideas on how to blend eyeshadow shades (I have plenty of Urban Decay shadows).
Saturday, December 21, 2013
On decisions
I know some of you may be looking forward to a blog on emotional reciprocity, but here's what's coming out tonight. It may not make you happy, it may piss you off, but after this past week, I'm writing it down.
Typically, when I write about difficult situations, I don't identify the person involved by name. This can be for any number of reasons, but mostly because of the number of people I know who are acquaintances or friends of other people I know. I hate making people feel like they have to take a side, and I typically don't try to drag others into things. When I write, I tend to do it in order to get thoughts out and sort through things I'm thinking. It works most of the time.
In recent times, I spoke of someone with whom I had cut off communication. I know I probably should have done it better, including a direct message to the person. Over the last year or so, I've been trying to cut the negativity out of my life, and that includes people who have more negatives than positives (or at least that's what they show).
And what I understand is that I will be who I am and others will be who they are. At the end of the day, we decide who we want in our lives and who we do not want in our lives. We can also work to minimize our exposure to people who drain us emotionally, even when what they do has nothing to do with us.
So, I cut the string with Shawn. I did it by unfriending him on Facebook (it's odd how different things are in 2013). I should have probably called; I should have probably emailed. But I didn't. And what has come of that has become an interesting situation, in which I'm an ungrateful bitch (which I understand was the case even before), with possible narcissistic personality disorder, being immature and our mutual friends and acquaintances are horrible for not taking one side or the other. It's been constant name calling, even before I made this decision.
In other words, I feel as though I was justified in my decision, even though I didn't go about it in the correct way. The only thing we can do is learn from it and move on, hopefully to do things differently the next time.
But despite this, I'm still trying to figure out how to reconcile my decision with the view I hold that I'm generally a good person, despite what he says. Not everyone will be friends with everyone else, and that's ok.
Unfortunately, when one person views a relationship differently than the other, friction happens. Expectations differ from each side - one person gives and gives and gives, then expects the other person to do the same, even though that person isn't necessarily as invested in the relationship. As much as we may like someone and want them to be our friend, it's up to them to decide if that's what they want too.
So, the point? Do what's right for you. Don't waste your energy being negative about others; use your energy to do something good. That's what I've been trying to do this past year - but whether or not I've been successful remains to be seen in the future.
Enjoy your time off, rest and plan for the future. Happy Everything to you all.
Typically, when I write about difficult situations, I don't identify the person involved by name. This can be for any number of reasons, but mostly because of the number of people I know who are acquaintances or friends of other people I know. I hate making people feel like they have to take a side, and I typically don't try to drag others into things. When I write, I tend to do it in order to get thoughts out and sort through things I'm thinking. It works most of the time.
In recent times, I spoke of someone with whom I had cut off communication. I know I probably should have done it better, including a direct message to the person. Over the last year or so, I've been trying to cut the negativity out of my life, and that includes people who have more negatives than positives (or at least that's what they show).
And what I understand is that I will be who I am and others will be who they are. At the end of the day, we decide who we want in our lives and who we do not want in our lives. We can also work to minimize our exposure to people who drain us emotionally, even when what they do has nothing to do with us.
So, I cut the string with Shawn. I did it by unfriending him on Facebook (it's odd how different things are in 2013). I should have probably called; I should have probably emailed. But I didn't. And what has come of that has become an interesting situation, in which I'm an ungrateful bitch (which I understand was the case even before), with possible narcissistic personality disorder, being immature and our mutual friends and acquaintances are horrible for not taking one side or the other. It's been constant name calling, even before I made this decision.
In other words, I feel as though I was justified in my decision, even though I didn't go about it in the correct way. The only thing we can do is learn from it and move on, hopefully to do things differently the next time.
But despite this, I'm still trying to figure out how to reconcile my decision with the view I hold that I'm generally a good person, despite what he says. Not everyone will be friends with everyone else, and that's ok.
Unfortunately, when one person views a relationship differently than the other, friction happens. Expectations differ from each side - one person gives and gives and gives, then expects the other person to do the same, even though that person isn't necessarily as invested in the relationship. As much as we may like someone and want them to be our friend, it's up to them to decide if that's what they want too.
So, the point? Do what's right for you. Don't waste your energy being negative about others; use your energy to do something good. That's what I've been trying to do this past year - but whether or not I've been successful remains to be seen in the future.
Enjoy your time off, rest and plan for the future. Happy Everything to you all.
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