It's like riding a bicycle...

Tonight, I went to my first yoga class in almost a year. Of course, I was freaking out about it during the day because I was pretty sure I wouldn't make it through the entire thing without a break in child's pose.

I've done yoga on and off since about 2008 (as well as I can remember). More recently, I've been off. Part of me didn't want to go back because I know I'm not very good at it.

Yes, I know there's no "so and so is better than me" in yoga. It's not about what others are doing, but it's about you and your practice. I know all these things, and it's taken me years to be able to acknowledge that. Every once in awhile, I can even go to a class and think that and be ok.

I ended up buying a 10 class pass in order to get my butt back to a class. I found a Yoga for Runners class at Hilltop Yoga and decided to start there.

I had a hard time keeping up tonight. I stopped when I wanted. I cursed chaturanga (I have weak arms). All of this seemed oddly familiar...it was like riding a bicycle.

But there were a few different things. The one that stuck out most was getting used to poses with a different body. Since the last time I went to yoga, I've started running and lost almost 40 pounds. It's a bit strange working with a body that you're still not quite used to.

I was able to pick up the sequence. I knew what the words meant (even if I can't say them...it's kind of like French for me now). I cursed chaturanga (did I mention that already?). I knew when to chill for a minute and catch up in the sequence. I sweat just as much or more than before. It actually sort of felt like I hadn't left.

I have a feeling in the upcoming weeks, I'm definitely going to need more yoga to keep me going. I'm going to need to take the time to just quiet my mind. Even if it is just "don't fall over" or "yup, that one was a belly flop."

Sometimes, you just have to keep moving. Sometimes, you need your brain to not be focused on all the other crap, and just say "move" or "breathe". Sometimes, you need to be calm in order to deal with the next round of the fight.

Namaste.