On rejection

Recently, I've been dealing with rejection in a few different forms, from a few different angles. It's never an easy situation, and clearly we all deal with it from time to time. And it got me thinking back to an instance from last year.

See, I was unemployed for the beginning of 2011. I had worked in the Senate for 5 years, my boss was term limited, and well, that's kind of the game. I applied for a lot of positions and interviewed for many, but nothing seemed to come together. It was rejection on a constant basis. There was one particular position I had interviewed for and thought I did well. The organization seemed to be one that I wanted to work for. It was respected in the area. They had a great mission.

And then I waited. And waited. I never got a call. Not even a "thanks for coming in to interview, but we've gone with someone else."

Now, I know that common courtesy has gone by the wayside because companies don't have the resources to make a quick 2 minute phone call or send a letter. But I can tell you that when you're job hunting, that cowardly type of rejection where you just don't contact the person is demoralizing.

When you are rejected, especially by people that you had some sort of respect for, it hurts. Rejection is never a good situation, but all too often we forget how to treat people with respect along with the rejection.

The good news is, I eventually learned they never filled the position. I also learned that it probably wasn't a company that I wanted to work for anyway. The turnover was high and the employees were unhappy. In hindsight, it wasn't a good fit for me. And luckily, a different opportunity presented itself shortly thereafter.

We are so quick to jump to conclusions about people that are unemployed and looking for work. "He isn't looking enough." "She needs to try harder." "Why don't you have a job yet?" And really, we don't understand, unless we've been there, how tough it can be to go through that process.

I'm not perfect. I've dealt with being the bearer of rejection before. I probably didn't do it right in some cases. But we should all work to not reject people in a demoralizing manner. We should work to be respectful and be constructive. In some ways, we have forgotten how to be decent human beings to each other.