Sunday, November 18, 2012
When you least expect it...
Words to live by, for sure.
However, while I've been working on my final exam for my class and working on Team in Training stuff this weekend, my mind has wandered back in time.
To a time when my first two real boyfriends decided that the best way to break up with me was to just not return my calls and completely ignore me.
To a time when a guy I had a crush on in high school decided that it would be funny to play a prank on me and it crushed me.
To a time in college when a boyfriend told me that I should get my teeth fixed.
To all the times I haven't felt good enough.
I had to laugh the other night when someone said to me "I can't imagine you NOT being popular in high school". Which I found funny - because I was so NOT popular in high school. Or in a lot of other situations since then.
Most times, I have been able to put a lot of the things I've gone through out of my mind and move on. But for some reason, the last couple of days have brought them back to the surface, even though I know I deal with the aftermath every day in my general sense of self. It's an inner struggle some days.
The above words are something I've been working on for a long time - once I realized that deserve better than the crappy thinking that's been ingrained in my head from a young age.
It made me think of the song "Glitter in the Air" by P!nk this morning and the lyrics, "Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone? Your whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone..."
Here's to not waiting for the phone any longer and start being kickass.